Wow, what a crazy year so far. I had so much trouble and stress with an IT project that I really needed a break and to start a little adventure with the goal to get out of my head.
One day before my holiday starts and due to the crappy weather in my favorite destinations I decided to take a multi day hike in Sweden called the Roslagsleden.
It’s a trail which you can walk from Danderyd to Norrtälje with about 110km or extend and walk up to Grisslehamn with + 80km. Here is my video about the Track. So funny that the initial picture is burger^^.
As usual my idea was to go wild camping and go on low budget, so I prepared myself with my new Nordisk lightweight tent and other 16 kilograms of gear food water and mosquito repellent.
I did not really have a fix plan(I love to be flexible) so I just started the walk in Danderyd which is about 20km north of Stockholm. I was stressed out from the beginning because… imagine – You want and need your holiday soo bad that you are not really worrying where you walk some days, so I wasn’t prepare for the walk no clue about way markings, no map and worst of all no more fucking patience
I just wanted to walk to move to throw myself into the wild and get some relaxing and nature full days.
To be honest I thought it would be more relaxing ^^
In a good shape and wonderful weather behind my back I checked the map from the point where the track started. It says that the way will be marked with orange colors here and there. The map also showed some other trips in the area around some kind of circle round.
Luckily I got some camping gas at the nearby gas station, so I was ready to move so I did.
The way started with easy forest like paths but after 6 minutes I was not sure to go left right or straight, so I checked the screenshot I made at the beginning. It says I just needed to continue. Within seconds, I was welcomed on the track from my most beloved fucking friends there are on this planet called : Mosquitoes. Man! I just stand there for 30 solid seconds, and they attacked me and wanted my blood… or even some of them my flesh I cannot tell. I continued walking and thought „ah, maybe now its diner time for them. Great heat which they love so let me just walk a little faster, this tactic proved good in Scotland because a midget is not strong enough to keep more that 3-4km/h. Just gear up a bit and problem is solved…“The next two hours I thought something new. These Mosquito-Fuckers are way stronger than midgets. They were everywhere especially in the woods, and they were quite aggressive, dude!!
They wanted to eat me alive. I got stressed sooo quickly and so intense I could not help myself.
Maybe you are different but the thing is I really hate these fuck bats so much. Regularly when I want to go to sleep and in the dark there is this sound of one like zzZzzzZZZZzzZz I have to kill it otherwise I just cannot sleep, period. Sometimes this takes 2-3 hours and takes all my sleep and sometimes even from my bed mates(^^). I am a sense full person, sorry 😉
After two hours I was so stressed and the way marking colors on the trees mixed up I was nearly at the beginning of the track cause I took the circle route, bravo. I learned that I will never walk again without a map. I went here and there and asked strangers for the way. Eventually somebody told me rough directions and offered me an idea where I can continue to find the way markings back again.
But not today. The darkness over me expanded more and more and up to that point I had no clue where I can pitch up my tent to finally get some rest.
Half an hour later at about 11:30 or so, I found a large field where I pitched up my tent in a corner and get me ready for bed – boy what a day. I just came to Sweden to relax to bathe in nature, relax and find some peace, what a joke I told myself but let’s call it a day.
I remember that the night was more or less ok. I woke up and saw out of my sleeping bag that it was light outside, so I was pretty happy that I slept this long. I checked my phone in anticipation that it was about 8 or so and saw it was 2:54. What a horror. Alright so where is my sleeping mask?! – I felt like a beauty queen. And these birds were so loud omfg. Back in Hanover I am kind of alright with bird sounds but in Sweden they are just crazily loud. This morning to my surprise there were no mosquitoes. I could easily pack my stuff and get my favorite hiking breakfast. Cereals with vanilla protein powder and some water, done. Off you go.
I found some hints for the track and thought, this is it but after two or three meters I instantly run out of markings.
Anyway because after a while I was standing in front of my very first lake in Sweden and this one was great. „Land of the thousand lakes“ – hell yea baby. So beautiful. Imagine a lake which looks soo naturally and is just surrounded by woods.
After an hour of frustration about the situation that I was just walking a blue line instead of the orange line I came to a info map which showed that I was on a (blue)circle track which leads into the orange Roslagsleden Track – FINALLY!!!!
From this point forward I found my groove and from then on the track really started.
Now I was in the right mode to get some km’s done – I would now make progress which is something I really need even more in my job but this is another topic 😉 I was quickly swallowed by the silence and I started talking to myself over and over again. „You have 11 days left just hiking. You and the nature – nothing more.“ I really like the fact that I can do everything I want beacuse I have everything I need with me and I was really free so to speak. Today was a lot of walking in the woods with mosquitoes which were covering my tracks.
I was still not completely convinced that the Roslagsleden is the best way which fits my needs. I was thinking of the Kungsleden on the one hand. A friend of mine told me some great stories of this track and made me envious. On the other hand I was told about the Höga kusten Leden which should be very cool with some superb views over the sea but NOBODY told me anything good about the Roslagsleden. Of course to be fair the Roslagsleden is a multi day hike with the smallest amount of effort to get there. To do the Kungsleden in the north would require a lot more preperation and travel time getting there.
All the time I was comparing my imagination of this way to the other ways and going by train or going by plane or or or... I was just not focused on one thing, damn it! Dissatisfation + aggressive mosquitoes = even more stress… waaa I couldn’t relax. Not in my head nor outside. Due to the fact that I was running out of water I needed to take a 3km detour to Töby golf club which was a pain in the ass because I already did 15km today and my feet began to burn. When I arrived there I felt so good. Now I could refill and recharge everything. I love this opportunities so much. First I charge the phone which takes up to two hours if its at 0%. Meanwhile, I got a coffee or some food. I started writing my diary and did some well needed social minutes with my friends. Further on I washed my clothes and myself. I am a huge fan of persoal hygiene.
Like other walks I made sure that I travel as lightweight as possible, so I had just three underpants and two shirts with me which I change up every day. When you wake up and want to slip into a shirt which has a full day of walking and sweating into it you would kill to get a fresh shirt, so I also took every chance to wash my clothes. After filling up my water I left the golf club. What a funny picture… me as a camper with stinky clothes and not perfectly shaved beard in a sport shirt and hiking boots standing inside of this perfectly glamorous golf world with polo shirts, styled hair, clothes I know from golfer movies and this attitude like
„I feel so rich and beautiful“.
At least this was the mindset I was giving these people, and I was SOO SOO wrong.
On the way back to the track I was hoping that I would catch a ride to safe some energie and substance on my feet, so I started with thumps up/hitchhiking. I thought never in 9 years I would get a lift from these arrogant ass…. and then a 100.000€ Mercedes stopped in front of me and opened its Kofferraum. This guy was soo cool. We talked for some minutes and I confessed my prejudice against golfers that they are all lame and superficial and… And then he ended my sentence with …“and that they are assholes“ and he was laughing Big time. LoooL. That was soo cool from a dude with a big car and this 100% picture of a golfer asshole insulting himself, Great!!
This time I slept at a place in the woods east of Karby. What a wicked place. A wonderful lake in front of me, a wooden shelter, good ground for a tent and a fireplace. This night Denis made Fire Huga Huga. It was so cool to do this kind of things and I felt like a kid playing with fire and eating roasted bread. That simple thing like gathering some wood alone in a forest made me happy somehow. I got something to do that matters to me… When I now watch the pictures it was even more beautiful. I often felt in a rush and this ate somehow my senses for my surroundings but I still have the smell of fire in my nose…rRrrRRRrr. Let’s call it a day.
After my first complete day of walking I felt quite alright with my body. The next day started with a lot of forest again and changed to open fields after a while. This was something I really liked when the scenery of the track changed, just open field and lovely farm houses. I got great weather and today I was alright with the mosquitoes.
I wanted to combine two stages with 13 and 16km to Lövhagen. I previously read that on the half-way there should be a sports club where you get a chance to fill up water and it was true. I got water, 30% electricity and even a shower. So funny that I wasn’t alone in the cabin where you normally prepare yourself for the soccer training.
This sports club was right in front of Brottby where I filled up my food reserves in an ICA Supermarket. Today was a good day and with my new „I can make fire“ thoughts I even got some beer, cheese, baguette, wicked bacon sauce and chocolate. I really wanted to have a great diner, so I bought another 4 kilograms food for my bag pack. This load I should realize later when continue walking.
For the moment I had a hard time believing my luck. Connected to the Supermarket there was a tiny kids library and I again could charge my phone up to 100% and could socialize with WIFI on kids chairs surrounded by kids books. A great thing of Sweden is that you just need a credit card, no coins anymore. Even for a good coffee for 1.30€ you pay by card. Nice!
In the library I had a short talk with the lady which runs it. We were talking about maps and routes, and she answered me in a context „this is probably one Swedisch mile“. I asked „what is a Swedish mile?“. She „I…don’t know“^^. Thanks lady.
After I continued walking with 4 additional kilograms in my bag pack plus a very hot day I got somehow beaten down by all of this. Even after 10 short minutes I needed another break and some more food but from then on I was ready to get the way done. The following 10km I was stressed out by hordes of mosquitoes waaahaa I HATE THEM. I was soo happy after leaving the forest and found the golf club in Lövhagen. When I first saw the golf course I instantly thought of Tin Cup’s Ending scene which I love very much.
It was at 21:30 so at first I wanted to find a place for my tent but there wasn’t so many spots for wild camping. On the opposite site of the golf club there was a place for camper van’s which was not occupied. And behind this spot on a grass field in a corner I set up my tent.
The grass was kind of wet and it was little taller than normal grass which was the reason for maaaany mosquitoes.
Nevertheless, I realized the flexibility with camping gear is just nice and worth it carry all the way. After I had diner near the golf club’s lake I went to sleep. Let’s call it a day.
Somewhere there I got the SMS from my phone provider that now all my roaming data were empty.
I expected that I could from then on just surf with limited bandwidth but there wasn’t any bandwidth left for me. It was just gone. No YouTube, WhatsApp etc. I had only SMS and GPS service left and was from now on dependent on WIFI spots somewhere.
The golf club again! This time I thought of it in a better way especially after I found out that there was a toilet outside. Cool, so I could give myself and my clothes a washing and refill water but wait… „What is this in the corner down there… it is a heater… with a power cable which goes into a… schuko plug…“ WEEHAAA Jackpot Baby.
Yesterday I needed my Phone a lot of, so I drained the batteries and now I can recharge and refill everything – Wiiicked!
I could even charge my phone get a coffee inside the golf restaurant and did some writings. The more unexpected the things are which I like the more I do enjoy them ;). For a moment I really thought of playing a bit golf but I had no equipment and no shoes. I would ruin this perfect green^^, so I continued walking realizing more and more pain in my legs especially in my lower right leg. This was some pain I never felt before. It was like an ongoing cramp but down there?
I considered staying at this place for about 395 Swedish crones (factor 10 so 39,50€) but I decided against it. I just regenerated everything as much as possible and tackled the next 5 kilometers to a place where there should be kind of resting place which I interpreted as a place to camp. Somewhere in the forest I lost the markings and followed just one way which was obviously the right one because it was heading to the Annarby Lake.
This evening I pitched my tent up on a playground near the lake and called it a day. Laying in my tent I realized some kind of an inner heat some form of fever and I wasn’t feeling well. I thought that I maybe got a little cold or some kind of illness, a sign that my batteries were low and I should stop rushing from these mosquitoes. I noticed my lower right leg was hurting and cramping more and more. I started to give myself a massage and combined it with Pferdesalbe, some muscle relaxing ointment and it worked quite well. These days I was doing the daily 20km in 4 hours which was just too fast with 20 kilograms so my body told me that every day.
The following morning I woke up very…drained and weak. Maybe not enough vitamins?! Does Asia noodles do not have all necessary vitamins?! I packed my gear and started walking but after 7 minutes I was done. My body felt so heavy and weak. There was no way I could walk 20 kilometers to Wira Bruck, the next village on the way, so I decided to hitchhike again and invited a relaxing day. This was not easy because my mind wanted to walk. It seemed like a very good day for walking and a nice profile the stage ahead to Wira Bruck but first I needed to rest. An old couple picked me up and there was an awkward silence the following 15km because they didn’t speak english but wait? Swedish guys who are not able to speak at least a bit English?! This was a trick?! They wanted my body and murder me in the woods!!
Luckily I was wrong and after they dropped me in Wira Bruck the sweet old Lady gave me a soda and a warm farewell hug. So cute.
Today I was open to get some comfort in an BnB or Hostel or so but in Wira Bruck wasn’t any not even shops, water or electricity.
I considered my options. About one kilometer I spotted the Roslagsleden markings again which lead to the Viren Lake, a biiiig lake with some very cool spots to camp. Before I checked this out I talked to some strangers where I can get a coffee and some electricity or even accommodation for the night. With the first two things he could help me by saying that 3km below Wira Bruck there is a ferry dock where a small shop, cafe and Restaurant. I still felt weak and exhausted but I needed these things, so I came up with the idea to get there by food, get all my stuff with me to have a chance meeting somebody who can help me with my accommodation problem.
So while standing at the Lake Viren and with this plan I needed at first to rest a bit but without a tent. „Please just get me some sleep or even easier let me lay down on the ground“ was my mind saying so I went to this shelter at the lake, prepared my iso mat sleeping bag and get myself 2-3 hours of… naaah not actual sleep but time to rest you know -well needed rest. It felt really right my body informed me. At 4pm I walked to the ferry dock and got everything I needed plus an awesome burger with the biggest burger pattie imaginable. In some way charging my mobile phone, doing some writing and refill my stuff fits my mental needs. When I do certain things simultaneously… feels very right to me. Isn’t there a chance to make money with this kind of skill or attitude?!
On the way back (this time no one picked me up for a short lift – assho…) I was worrying about the weather because it looked like shower and thunderstorm especially in the night/following morning. Should I go some kilometers that I would have a more relaxed tomorrow or should I go back to the place where I rested, pitch up my tent to even have a plan B when the rain and storm is too heavy?! Tonight I was still in the mood to walk some k’s but would I find some shelter on the way, some place to camp?!
Do you know the feeling when you later say to yourself „thanks very much my lovely gut. Most of the time you are leading me in the right direction“. I slept near the shelter at Viren Lake and was very satisfied with my decision because the rain and thunder started at 6 in the morning and in a short rain break I could move to the wooden shelter and got all the time to pack my stuff, have breakfast and get myself going. But I have to say that my Nordisk Telemark 1 LW protected me perfectly against rain and wind. I felt secure and it was cozy inside.
Luckily I took a big breakfast with banana protein bar and cereals which I later needed to escape the hordes of mosquitoes. After I jumped in my ponjo I started the day which was supposed to be raining all day. In my ponjo I thought I am now totally water resistent. That was partly true but after I walked for 3 minutes through some tall grass I was convinced that my water resistance was for shit. The ponjo was covering everything down to my knees but not below that so after a short time my shoes came up with sounds. You know the sounds. Imagine you walk through mud and water and your shoes are filled up with it. With every move your feed pushes the water and mud out of the shoes and make these sounds witsch witsch watsch – welcome in the dirt baby.
Right now it is half past ten, and we have 20 kilometers to go, let’s call it holiday.
Even worse was the fact that more and more mosquitoes had not had sex during the night, so they were verrry horny on me and pure aggressive. This sound of zzZzzzzZZzsszssSSszzZ directly in my ear. Mygga, the mosquito repellent spray wasn’t doing a good job, so I needed to rush again, what a horror. Due to the fact that there were not so many options to refill and recharge my things and my food I needed to take a detour here and there. This time I headed to pizza shop near Bergshamra. At this point most of my clothes were completely wet and I was quite done too, so I stayed there for two hours. I used this time very productive as you will see but at first I needed some food.
Dude, I cannot put the feeling in writing as I consumed the pizza and ice-cold coke, wooow that was soo well-deserved I thought 😉 Meanwhile I found a tactic to dry all my clothes. You know these heaters in bathrooms to dry your hands after washing?! I used them slightly…different. It was a super small one square meter bathroom so I started my dry procedure.
The next 2 hours I spend at least 45 minutes in the bathroom trying to dry all my clothes especially my shoes and socks. But I felt a little awkward about this and please don’t talk about waste of energy, I just (do I need to appolgi…) a fuck that, I just did it. So once again imagine yourself in this small bathroom where I was standing with closed door and to see me dry my wet but super dirty sweaty and smelly stuff…
I just went out of the bathroom and wrote ate and socialized a bit to use the time while my stuff was drying. With the time other costumers spend time in the piza shop. Then a woman with two kids came inside and headed to the little bathroom. I could see their face by entering. It looked like somebody pooed on the floor and it was still there. After some seconds of their business they went out with a quite similar face expression with which they went inside… that was… I like the memory 😀
After two hours and many sessions in the bathroom I continued my way to Penningby and was so good to go with my dry stuff and shoes.
It wasn’t raining but it was still kind of wet in the bushes and in the woods so all my work getting my stuff dry was blown away after 20 minutes while continuing the Roslagsleden. I arrived near Penningby at 9pm and once again I needed to find a spot for wild camping.
On the next morning this was definitely my lowest moment on the whole track^^ because I stopped yesterday with wet clothes and the night made it even worse. Now I had wet shoes in- and outside plus that they were cold. Great Great fucking Great, wow I wished myself at home that morning. I was just sick of all these insects and wet stuff and pain and bag pack and and (it is so easy to talk yourself in this negative complaining childish mode).
I packed my dry socks in plastic bags and then into my shoes to have dry feet at least for some time. I got my stuff together and started walking with the goal Vigelsjö, Norrtälje.
Again I was running out of water so there was no water left to wash my important areascause I needed it for drinking to survive you know.
The feeling when you are not sure where the next possibility is to get some water is quite… real 😉
After 20 minutes I passed a horse paddock where I not directly asked if they had some water to wash my balls but more or less I did it this way. I got partly naked and gave myself a wash. Throughout this time some mosquitoes used this as a perfect breakfast and ate me here and there grrrml. I just see no reson in it. Why should God create insects like mosquitoes. Ok it’s good stuff for spiders but than there is no sense that human can be scared to spiders… There are things in this world I don’t…
The whole track was completely empty. I have seen not one single soul on the Roslagsleden.
Within the day the weather changed to sunny and my mood brightens up a bit until I lost my phone. That was super crucial.
I got it all the time in my trousers pocket and now it was gone. Holy Moly Crap what what how, why, where?
Quite crazy when you are in a forest in a foreign country and you don’t really know how to act without a phone.
I searched here I searched there and after ten minutes I found at in the grass somewhere. Pfhuuuuuu lucky bastard.
This moment I realized how important that phone is to me – my gate in the world so to speak.
I still was running out of water, so I asked a local resident, and he instantly helped me. I also got an ice-cold coke and together we spend some minutes on his terrace. He was really cool, and we talked about the way, his family and these mosquito-fuckers. He said that it would be even worse in the north of Sweden. I was thinking of the Kungsleden, where there is just nature and no chance to escape from them. There I understood why there were so many fallen and broken trees crossing the Roslagsleden. In January 2019 a hurricane like storm tackled Sweden and did some heavy damage to the woods and nearby houses. He told me that his car was gotten wracked by a fallen tree and the insurance didn’t care due to a paragraph:“ We do not pay in case of higher force, Thank you“
Once again my lower right leg began to cramped and ached telling me that I needed to end the day in the next time somehow. My goal was the campsite in Vigelsjö. Still, 3km to go. I forget about this after I saw the MC Donald‘ s sign. Civilization!! I really felt like somebody walks for weeks in nature without any kind of civilized contact.
Out of habit I went to MC Donald’s, and ordered something charged my mobile did some writing and refilled my water.
I don’t know how to say but to be honest all the surroundings in MC Donald’s were so loud so uncomfortable so… I needed to leave this place and continued my Journey to the end of the
I really like the fact of walking from start to end with some kind of sense or purpose as you will.
This point was directly at the Lommarbadet lake and what a beautiful lake, Maaaan. At first, I continued to the campsite to have that done but I told myself to later come back and have some diner here with beer baguette cheese and stuff, so I did. That really was a wonderful and peaceful feeling sitting there and watching the sunset. I told my body that from now on I would gear down a little to get some regeneration.
The campsite was quite cool, very comfortable with WIFI everywhere showers kitchen and stuff.
In the kitchen was a TV which showed some movie with Jacky Chan and Johnny Knoxville two actors I really can enjoy and funnily I didn’t know the movie called Skip Trace.
I think it is some easy cheese but there are many times in my life I would just get this ease and funny entertainment by guys like Jacky and Johnny. There I enjoyed my self pretty much but I felt… how shall I say… insecure what to do next ’cause with this leg I could not walk another 80 kilometers with 18 kilograms of beef in my bag. After I washed and cleaned my whole bag with clothes‘ n stuff I walked to Norrtälje City to get an overview about my situation.
I actually ask the friendly ladies from the info desk in Norrtälje „Just imagine you have 6 full days and unlimited resources what would you do?“
They came up with ideas like „I would rent a bike and go biking on Gotland“ or „you need to see the north it is just magnificent“ or „go with the ferry to see Eckerö and enjoy lunch buffet on the boat“.
It is somehow crazy. When I don’t have a rough plan and I have instead too many options what I could do with so much time I get a bad gut feeling some kind of narrowness and shallow breathing.
After this moment of insecureness I continued to admire the beauty of Norrtälje and ended up with a plan.
I would take the bus to Grisslehamn and go with the ferry to Eckerö and have some imba lunch. At least I would feel a little *productive and I would see some nice spots on the coastline.
The bus took about an hour and I got a really cool drop off – it was directly at the coast line. Like in the movie the perfect storm there was a small harbor and two hand full fisher boats and this sea smell… hmmm just a perfect moment. Like many times I dropped my bag pack somewhere on a wall and discovered the surroundings. I never really thought of a robbery or anything like that. Only crazy nuts noobs would steal a heavy 20 kg bag pack with my dirty shorts and wet socks^^. If you need more security just place the wet and dirty clothes on the outside of the bag, done.
This night I camped at Grisslehamns Camping a really cool spot and a lake side which was WOoooOooW totally Awesome. Such a big lake and I there got some really cool pictures and the first seconds for my movie. Like the last days I did my routine: Shower, Wifi, writing, water, clothes washing. There was not so much place for my tent, so I pitched itup pretty much directly behind a camper van with where I took care to not penetrate their privat-/comfort zone. On the next morning at 6.am I needed to move the tent little more on the right side of the camper van so that I have some shadow. Otherwise, I would get cooked in my tent until 7.am… When the camper-van-people woke up they told me later that they were kind of surprised? Scared?
Excited? Something like that but they were cool. They understood my situation, and they fed me with a coffee and a sandwich, thanks guys!
I packed my stuff and walked to the ferry dock where the ferry Eckerö Tours already waited on me.
It was a perfect day and it was really cool on deck. So the breakfast was delicious and big but the fact that the boat was duty free while driving and that so many people loaded their hand trucks full with alcohol astounded me. These were some crazy bastards Dude.
The whole trip I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do next, so I decided right before Eckerö that I will go back to Grisslehamn and walk another 20km to finalize the track for me and to finally find peace with the Roslagsleden.
After 8km my feet began to cramp heavily and ached a lot that I had trouble to continue.
My water was running out and I again had to fight against mosquitoes. Should I really continue? For what reason?
I made a long break and did some deep breaths. I was sitting next to the sea on some rocks and checked my options.
But for the moment I enjoyed this spot. So quiet and this time I really could get into.
I continued walking and every time when I was concerned of my lack of water supply I just rang on some doors and kindly asked.
Nearly all the time I got a small talk, water, sometimes an ice-cold coke, some strawberries or some snacks.
My last camp spot was very special. It was pretty much the best one in the last days directly at the sea. This was gorgeous and the following morning at 3:19 it was the first time that I woke up to see the sunrise. After about 130km, so much stress with mosquitoes, insects, bumpy nights and asia noodles – I decided that I had enough of this. I was tired and even more… I
felt home sick which was great because I totally understood my body and my mind.
My mind wanted to play some video games watch movies talk to friends and slip into fresh clothes So I went via bus from Älmsta to Norrtäle to Stockholm an had a night in the city backpackers.
Two things really bothered me. First I realized my enormous pain in my lower right leg. I really couldn’t move it was so cramped up.
Such a disaster cause it was my first time in Stockholm and I nearly died in anticipation to see the city.grml grml
And secondly that night I was told that Sting ya THAT Sting was playing an open air concert but it was almost over. Entrance for 10€… that was very hard for me as a musician who has not seen many big musicians like him… Roxanne!! Every Breath! So Lonely!! Englishman in New York. The mid twenty-year olds in my dorm asked „Sti…, what!?“ Pff Nooobs!
The next day I was back in Germany, and I was more than fine with this.
I don’t know but this time I couldn’t enjoy the walking holiday that much. I was somehow under pressure and stressed many times.
It was a cool experience and I think I will return to do the Kungsleden or Höga Kusten Leden but for now I restart myself to enjoy my apartment and some hot shower.